Incorporating Your Asian American Heritage into Your Wedding Photos
I’m a second generation Asian American wedding photographer, and I often get questions from potential clients who have a similar background along the lines of: “We’d like to do XYZ, is this something you’ve photographed before? Do you have any suggestions on what the best time is for a tea ceremony? We want to mix both our Asian heritage and our American background into the day, how have your past clients handled this?”
Sometimes it’s a casual ask, from a couple that wants to be respectful to the traditions their parents care about, but they might themselves not hugely identify with. For others, it’s a hugely instrumental part of their day. I’m here to tell you that there is no one right answer (unfortunately), but finding a photographer who understands and respects that cultural background is crucial for capturing authentic and meaningful wedding photos. Not only does it ensure that your photographer is sensitive to your cultural traditions and customs, but it also allows you to incorporate your cultural heritage into your wedding photos in a way that feels genuine and personal.
It can get overwhelming; on top of everything you have to normally plan for your wedding, now you might have all these family traditions that you might not be familiar on how to “properly” integrate them into your day. So here’s some common tips that I’ve given clients in the past, I hope that helps!
Tip #1: Ask your family
I know it sounds cheesy, but there’s nothing wrong with asking for some help from your parents or an auntie about when the best time is to do a tea ceremony. In my experience, they’re often done before the big ceremony, or immediately afterwards during cocktail hour. Quick story time: when I was at my cousin’s wedding I was myself a part of the tea ceremony, and afterwards I was casually talking to my sister about it. We were both like, “are we going to have to do a tea ceremony at our own wedding someday?” My mom, who happened to be right behind us and overheard us, immediately and very pointedly said, “AHEM OF COURSE YOU ARE.” My sister and I shut up immediately, but my point is to simply say that as second generation Asian Americans, the cultural traditions we incorporate into our weddings often have even more meaning for our parents and families than it might for you as the bride or groom. So if you’re confused on what’s the best way to do it, there’s little harm in asking them.
Tip #2: Find a photographer who speaks the langauge
Wrangling family at a wedding can be really stressful as a bride or a groom. It helps if your photographer doesn’t need to rely on you or a bridesmaid to gather all the aunties and uncles for the wedding pictures. I speak both Cantonese & Mandarin (and have team members who speak Vietnamese), and I can’t tell you how much fun it is when I can surprise family members with some of my (admittedly terrible) Chinese. They’ve usually heard me speak English all day, might assume I’m an ABC who only “sik teng mm sik gong,” and I get a kick out of surprising them after the ceremony when I start asking for specific combinations of family members to come and take photos. Where I draw the line is when the aunties start asking if I have a girlfriend.
Tip #3: Keep us updated
Outfit changes, special decorations, tea ceremonies, gate crashing, what have you. Whatever you end up incorporating into your day, make sure your photographer and/or coordinators know about it, so we can be there to capture every moment. Additionally, every family’s traditions are different, so it's important to communicate your cultural expectations clearly. Be open and honest about the traditions and customs that are important to you, and provide examples of photos from other weddings that have successfully incorporated cultural elements. We may also have suggestions for how to best capture and showcase your cultural heritage in a way that feels authentic and natural.
In Closing
Finding a photographer who understands and appreciates your cultural background can help create meaningful and authentic wedding photos that truly reflect you. Whether you're looking for a wedding photographer in NYC or elsewhere, keep these tips in mind to ensure that your cultural background is properly represented in your wedding photos.